You are in a job interview and feel the nerves set in. You did all of the basics- arrived on time, dressed professionally, and practised your answers but can’t get rid of the jitters as your most professional self gets ready to take the stage.
Right away you feel stiff, and when asked questions you answer as if you are reading a scripted monologue and notice that the interviewer isn’t warming up. You are trying too hard and can’t seem to stop yourself, and the interview feels more like a series of questions rather than a smooth dialogue where both parties are engaged.
When I interview candidates that appear as if they are putting on a show and not being themselves I want to shout at them “Drop the act!” – it is always important to come across as human and make a real connection.
A huge part of my role as a recruiter is to prepare candidates to interview well so that they can get their dream job & in this post, I want to cover how to make a genuine connection and be a good conversationalist.
In my opinion, the way to win an interviewing consists of three important steps:
Have a positive mindset! When you are positive that you will do well and approach the interview as a conversation rather than a high stake situation you will be confident which is a key component of being a good communicator.
Do what you can to prepare: Approach each interview as a learning experience. If you are given feedback, implement it so that you can improve.
Be authentic and a good conversationalist. Sure, it is important to know how to answer questions well but your conversational skills are key to making a good impression which I will cover in this post.
Get rid of the “facade”
When you have the mindset that you will do well and you are prepared you can relax enough to speak clearly and show your most authentic self. Don’t appear as if you are putting on a facade which by definition means “an outward appearance which is deliberately false and gives you a wrong impression about someone or something. Normally, I would tell candidates “Practice, practice, practice”. Practice in your car, in front of the mirror, practice in front of friends but what happens when we sound too scripted, go into answering auto-pilot and interviewers catch on to such fakery?
A part of practising your answers must be having the self-awareness to adjust your tone and body language so that no you have a natural and engaging demeanour. A good way to practice would be to identify which interview questions throw you off, (for me it is the “tell me about yourself question”) and come up with an answer you feel comfortable with! Once you know your answer without looking at a notecard practice in front of a friend until you are able to articulate yourself with ease and confidence.
The easiest way to come across as natural is to believe in what you are saying and make sure your answers are from the heart. This is why when I prepare candidates to interview, I first begin with establishing the candidate's personal and professional goals rather than providing a list of generic interview questions with cookie-cutter answers.
Generally, the interviewer is looking to establish 1. can you do the job 2. are a good mutual fit for the company and position 3. do they like you. In my prep there are about five or six vital questions that every candidate should be able to answer and the more you become familiar with your answer the easier you can explain with ease. A successful politician wouldn’t look at a speech once just once before performing in front of a huge crowd just like you should be familiar with your answers so that you can communicate at the highest level.
Rehearsing does not sacrifice authenticity but shows the interviewer you are prepared and well-spoken. When you practiced your answers enough that you can speak with the same level of confidence as if you were talking to a close friend- Viola! Your interview facade is gone.
When I am coaching candidates that need to “drop the act” I always mention the clip in Gone Girl where the main character Nick is trying to convince the nation that he loves his wife and that he is accused of murdering. When Nick is around his hometown friends and sister he is charming and engaging but in front of the cameras, he is stiff, hard to relate to and comes across as lying. To try to get Nick to snap out of this act his lawyer questions him (practice is key!) and throws a gummy bear at him every time he sounds like he is lying.
A good method while practising is to listen to your voice on record. It is easy to tell when your tone sounds like you or something different. While it sounds silly that people would put on a “facade” and change their voice and body language for an interview this is extremely common and typically is what sets candidates apart. This advice sounds simple because it is – be your most authentic self so that you can make a genuine connection.
